


Sabrina 's Second Chance

by BrightestSun



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Sad, Support, especially when others don't notice right away that you're trying!, growing as a person is harder, highschool is hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-02-26 12:18:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13235595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrightestSun/pseuds/BrightestSun
Summary: Sabrina realises that her friendship with Chloé is unhealthy and has turned her into a bully. It's time for a change!But will the other's accept the new Sabrina, is changing her old habits going to be that simple, and how will Chloé react to find her lackey finally growing a spine?





	1. Chapter 1

Sabrina groaned in frustration, rereading Chloé’s social media pages for the hundredth time. The phone shook in her trembling hands, making it hard to read the text on the picture, but it hardly mattered, the image was burned into her irises, potentially for life. On the picture, Chloé was posing happily in the seat of a cross continental airliner, first class of course, with a text saying “Colorado here we come!” Bad enough Chloé had said nothing to her about the trip, sure Chloé went on short trips without her once in awhile and sure it hurt a lot everytime, but this time… In the picture, in every picture Chloé had taken updating the trip, Chloé was with some girl, some girl Sabrina didn’t even know! Sabrina had worked hard stalking the girl since, but she hardly seemed to have any social media presence at all! What kind of cavewoman was she, and how in the world had she wrapped Chloé around her dumb gorgeous fingers!? All Sabrina could figure was that the girl’s name was Nathalie and that her father was the inventor of some computer thing. She went to the prestigious *Plink* oh… a new update on Chloé’s page! What now? Sabrina excitedly opened Chloé’s page, surely by now this Nathalie had said something to piss Chloé off, it took years of practice to sidestep the NO! Sabrina audibly gasped as the picture loaded on her screen, Chloé and Nathalie were side by side, posing for the camera, and Nathalie was wearing Sabrina’s Barret! The one Chloé had promised her yesterday! And the pic was tagged NEWBFF!? How could she!? 

Sabrina actually shrieked in utter frustration, she had been completely betrayed, ditched by the wayside like the top she’d loved but Chloé had told her made her look like a slut. It hadn’t made her look like a slut, it had just made it noticeable that her boobs were bigger than Chloé’s, couldn’t have that, Chloé had to be better in every way, otherwise there’d be hell to pay! Looking at Nathalie, it was painfully obvious that she was leagues prettier than Sabrina, she wasn’t quite as beautiful as Chloé, but Sabrina looked like dirt compared to the two of them. She was dirt to the two of them! Chloé was probably talking about how stupid and annoying Sabrina was, always running around behind her like a poodle! Who was she kidding… Chloé didn’t even fucking care enough to complain about her! 

Sabrina threw her phone angrily against her floor, the phone slammed at a bad angle against the wooden boards with a hollow, unpleasant sound. Sabrina immediately regretted her actions, picking up the phone frantically, the screen looked slightly damaged, and it wouldn’t respond to her touch, the phone was simply stuck on the image of Chloé and Nathalie, NEWBFF’s. Sabrina felt tears beginning to form at her eyes, she tried to stop them but remembered the last time she almost cried. Chloé had looked at her with pure spite “what? Are you really going to cry? That’s like so pathetic. It’s not like I meant it, can’t you take a joke?” the image of Chloé’s disgust and spite made the anger well up in Sabrina like a volcano, erupting in tears and loud, sobbing cries, like a wounded animal. 

Sabrina clutched the broken phone against her stomach, her fingers clenching it so tightly that they turned white. She felt like there was a wound in her stomach, like she could feel right where Chloé had stabbed her, she was slowly feeling the pain spread through her, soon to kill her. Which was fine, it’s not like anyone would miss her anyway. Things would be better for everyone if she just disappeared! Noone cared at all…!

A knock on her door brought her momentarily out of her dark thoughts, “princess?” her dad’s hesitant voice came through the wooden barrier “are you alright in there?” Sabrina looked at herself in the full length mirror in her room, she’d never looked so pathetic, literally snot nosed, face as red as a tomato, on the ground in her pajamas even though it was the afternoon. She didn’t want anyone to see her like this, “go away Roger! I’m fine!” she yelled, her voice cracking with sobs and screaming with anger. The door opened and her dad entered, still wearing his uniform, his expression worried, then devastated as he saw Sabrina, pathetically sprawled on the ground like a ragdoll thrown by Chloé’s invisible hand. 

“Pumpkin!? What’s wrong!?” he began approaching her, worried, panicked almost, his arms stretched towards her. “I said go away!” she screamed, he didn’t comply, just going forward like a bullheaded moron, unable to understand that she just wanted to disappear. “GO AWAY!” she screamed, throwing her phone towards him with surprising force, he sidestepped and Sabrina saw her phone shatter into a million pieces against the wall. It made her cry even harder, she knew she wasn’t getting a new one anytime soon, what would Chloé say if she had to get some knock off brand phone!? Would Chloé even talk to her ever again…?

Sabrina felt herself doubling over, crying harder. “It’s ok pumpkin… I miss her too…” she felt her dad’s arms gently around her, he was shaking, he was… crying. Why would he miss Chloé? oh… Sabrina felt her entire world stop for just a second, it was August 8th. Sabrina racked her brain, how could she have forgotten that? It slowly dawned on her, the last week or so… Her father had spent so much more time with her than she was used to, taken days off. It had been great actually… But of course… he’d been doing it so she wouldn’t… so she wouldn’t think about it… So she wouldn’t remember that her mom died exactly two years ago…

Sabrina felt her emotions vanish, all her anger was suddenly gone, as though someone was sucking every ounce of emotion directly out of her heart, leaving her only pure and bitter sadness. She leaned against her dad and felt the tears flowing anew, like she was back there, this was exactly like how they had been on that day two years ago. On the floor, in each other’s arms, crying their bitter hearts out. Hearing her father’s pained, soft sobbing, she realized how much he needed her. How could she have been so selfish as to think she could just disappear… 

Sabrina thought back on the year she’d had after they moved to Paris, about how her dad and she had needed a new start. She didn’t have a single friend back in Nantes, she had been a total loser, liking loser things and spending all her loser time alone. She thought it was going to be the same when she came to Paris, but just before school started she had been introduced to Chloé through their dad’s meeting. Chloé had looked like the kind of girl that had always spend their time making her feel like a hole in the ground, she expected Chloé to do the same, but instead she’d been really kind. She’d given her a total makeover, helped her look a way she never thought she could, help her feel like a person! Sabrina had thought that Chloé had been the greatest thing to ever happen to her, so why were things like this? Why did she find herself once more, feeling like nothing, like less than nothing! Chloé’s bullying was more covert, like a stealth bomber, but it was just as effective at destroying Sabrina’s spirit. And that was exactly what Chloé had been doing since they first met, destroying her spirit.

Sabrina looked at her dad’s tightly wound shoulders, she could smell the sweat of a long day’s work on him. He worked so vigilantly every day for her, so she could have nice things, so she could be just a little bit like Chloé, it was completely stupid! She’d been so unfair to him, to herself… She’d even helped Chloé bully so many of the kids in class. She’d become everything she hated. Sabrina pushed herself tighter against her dad, breathing deeply, the tears slowly coming to a stop. I’ll do better from now on dad… and mom. Starting tomorrow I’ll do better for both of you, I promise!


	2. Chapter 2

Sabrina spend that evening rummaging through her closet, contemplating, comparing, groaning. She barely had any clothes that weren’t her usual ‘hiding under a sweather’ style. She had enough dress shirts to clothe the salvation army, and about a hundred sheep’s worth of sweater vests. She sighed deeply, she wanted to wear something that wasn’t her usual self, but she couldn’t just magically make a new style appear in her closet. Her dad had promised to buy her a new phone, but she knew that meant they wouldn’t have any kind of money to buy her a new outfit, let alone a new wardrobe. She looked at herself wearing only a dress shirt, it was… alright, but definitely missing something. The simple style was kind of nice, a little less shielded without the vest, showing off her figure a bit more, she worked hard on this figure, it didn’t seem fair that she didn’t show it off.

Her hair felt like a helmet, it wasn’t like she could easily change that though, she could cut it shorter but… with her style she already came off a little… dykey. Shorter hair would _definitely_ not help. She opted for a simple light blue barrette, matching her usual shorts, instead of her usual hair band.  She nervously posed in the mirror, she looked exactly as she usually did, just underdressed and wearing a stupid barrette! She threw the fancy hat to the floor and fell face first into her bed with a groan. Her glasses hurt as they smacked against the bridge of her nose, smushed between her and the bed. _My glasses…_ Sabrina took them off and inspected them, the ‘dot over the i’ in her fluent language of plain and mousey.

Sabrina found her contacts; she rarely wore them, she mostly used them to play Chat Noir for Chloé. Maybe though… It just might be a good start. She was probably never going to get used to putting on contacts, touching one’s eyeballs belonged in movies she wasn’t allowed to see, not in her bathroom, but every time she did it, it became a little easier. Her hands shook considerably less this time, but then, last time Chloé had been looking right at her while she did it, making snide comments and telling her to hurry. Sabrina smiled, the lenses having slipped on easily, barely hurting, it almost felt easy when no one was looking at her.

It felt weird, having no borders at the edge of her vision. It was the kind of thing she had completely learned to not notice, but now that it was gone, she felt as though the world suddenly went from 4:3 to widescreen, she looked around, checking the corner of her vision, strangely aware of how much she could see. Using her brush she parted her hair a little off to the left, offsetting her normally symmetrical style, placing the barrette on her left side to make up the balance. 

Sabrina closed her eyes for a moment, feeling the slight touch of the contacts against her eyelids, not hurting, but reminding her they were there. She breathed deeply in anticipation, then looked at herself in her full length mirror. She couldn’t help but feel disappointed, it was acceptable but she didn’t look as different as she felt. Still, a smile snuck its way up her face, she felt a lot more like herself. This was the first change to her outfit she’d made without Chloé for, well, as long as she’d known her. Speaking of changes Chloé wouldn’t green light; Sabrina unbuttoned the top three buttons on her shirt, revealing more skin than she was usually comfortable with, or rather than Chloé was usually comfortable with.

Sabrina struck a pose in front of the mirror, _this actually kind of works for me_ she thought, a sense of giddiness rising in her. So let Chloé disappear off to America for God knows how long, it gave Sabrina time to become a totally new her, a version of her that would make Chloé boil with jealousy! The thought practically made her giggle, for a moment she allowed herself to imagine Chloé, begging her to take her back. She wondered if she would… just having the choice, who could ask for more? She let out a small squee, just thinking about it.

Sabrina met her bed that night feeling excited and strangely calm, like the calm before the storm. To think that she was going to face school tomorrow, a totally new her. They would compliment her on her new look, and everyone would pay attention to her!

 _Why is no one paying attention to me!?_ Sabrina was sitting alone by her desk, trying desperately to keep her leg from shaking. She couldn’t believe no one had mentioned her new look, no one had even looked at her twice, she’d almost hurt her neck making sure to see how every person looked at her when they first saw her, but there was nothing! She wasn’t paying attention at all to what was happening in class, she knew she should be taking notes, Chloé would expect her to make her homework… but to hell with Chloé!

Sabrina brought out her purple pencil, the one with long light purple hairs at the end, she began fidgeting with it, softly stroking and pulling the hairs of the pen under the desk. What was she going to do? If Chloé returned before Sabrina had made friends with the other classmates, that would leave Sabrina without a friend in the world… again. She could crawl back to Chloé, again, she wouldn’t know anything was off, and nothing had to change. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad… Sabrina corrected her glasses, realizing they weren’t there. _No!_ Sabrina had decided she was going to do better, she had promised! She could do this! All she had to do was make friends with some of the others. That couldn’t be so hard, right…?

Sabrina began forming a mental checklist of her classmates, first, to her left, Nino and Adrian, Chloé would lose her Gucchi if she came back and Sabrina was besties with those two. It was a fun thought, but Sabrina needed a girlfriend to replace Chloé. Besides, Adrien would probably think she was up to something if she started attempting to be chummy with them, it just wasn’t going to work.

  
moving on, behind Sabrina sat Mylene and Alix, they were both pretty intense in each their own way, Alix was really cool, into sports and girls… hanging out with her would start some rumors Sabrina was not wild about, she also had no idea what they would even do together, except make out… Sabrina shook the image out of her mind and moved on.

Mylene was kind of spineless, she reminded Sabrina a bit of how she was before she met Chloé. She was kind and genuine, but she wasn’t the prettiest, and she was pretty fat, being around fat girls made her remember how plumb she used to be herself, it made her really uncomfortable.  


 Alya and Marinette… Marinette had tried standing up to Chloé for her, at least twice. She was basically Chloé’s arch enemy, and she seemed really nice. As soon as they’d become friends, Marinette had started ignoring her and making excuses though… could she trust that she wasn’t just putting on an act, that she wasn’t just trying to get Sabrina away from Chloé to better her own chances with Adrien… Then again, Sabrina was asking them to give her a second chance… she wasn’t in any position to demand perfection from anyone, if she did become friends with Marinette and Alya, they would really help her against Chloé, and Chloé would be livid! The thought made her smile, top of the list right now.

Third row was all guys, she chose to ignore them. That just left Rose and Juleka, both of them were really meager, they would crumble in front of Chloé if it came to that. No, definitely Marinette and Alya was the best place to start, then maybe reassess if that didn’t go well.  Sabrina completely gave up on following the lesson, instead she began planning out how she would approach Marinette, she probably only had one shot at this!

 


	3. Chapter 3

Sabrina stood in the school bathroom by herself, correcting any small imperfections which had arisen from her fussing. She combed her hair into place and straightened her barrette, this was a new day for her, a new her. She knew that, she could feel it, but other’s had to be made aware of it as well, she’d been naïve to think that they would approach her. Steeling herself, Sabrina thought over how to talk to the two girls again.

 _“oh hey Marinette! Do you like my new look?”_ no… fishing for compliments wasn’t going to work, moreover it was pathetic. _“hey Marinette, you walk home right? Maybe we could walk home together? Get to know each other”_ Sabrina saw her friendliest smile freezing in the mirror, why in the world would Marinette feel like being walked home, and Sabrina lived in the opposite direction from Marinette, if she knew that then it would be obvious just how desperate Sabrina was.

“ _hey Marinette! I happen to have Adrian’s hairbrush at home, still has some of his hair on it! Maybe you’d like it?”_ that… could maybe work, Marinette seemed just as crazy about Adrien as Chloé was. “where’d you get the hairbrush from?” Sabrina smiled “well, Chloé appreciates when I look out for stuff like that, I saw he threw it out yesterday because it broke so…” _wait… who…?_ Sabrina turned to see Alix standing next to her casually. Sabrina froze, _how much of that had I said out loud!?_ Alix gave her a teasing smile “garbagebrush? I know I’d be your friend” she said sarcastically.

Sabrina felt her face flush, where was there a nice distracting super villain when she needed one!? “it’s… it’s rude to spy on other people!” Sabrina said defensively, trying to take the higher ground with an accusatory look which glanced off of the purple haired girl. Alix raised an eyebrow knowingly at Sabrina, she didn’t have to say “ _you would know_ ”, instead she said “you forgot to put up a sign that said ‘occupied for Sabrina’s solo performance’”. Alix chuckled at her, making Sabrina beam with shame, she struggled to find a proper way to respond, if Chloé was here she’d chew Alix up completely… but Chloé wasn’t here.

Sabrina felt a calm hand on her shoulder, surprised she looked up to find Alix giving her a genuine smile “don’t sweat it Sabrina, Marinette is really nice, just be straight with her, that’s all anyone can ask” Sabrina felt her shame vanish, Chloé would have hoarded this over her for weeks, but instead Alix had comforted her, known just what to say, like an actual friend. Sabrina returned Alix’ smile “thank you… um… would _you_ maybe wanna hang out sometime…?” Sabrina felt awkward asking, especially after having been seen like that, Alix might think she was really desperate. Correction, Alix might easily figure out how desperate Sabrina actually was.

Alix nonchalantly washed her hands “I don’t know, are you cool enough to hang with me?” she asked, causing Sabrina to nod desperately “I can be cool!” she practically yelled. Alix looked at her empathically, like how you looked at a child who’d just said something preciously stupid “I was kidding dude… um but yea… maybe. I’m heading home now, let’s talk tomorrow ok?” Sabrina wasn’t sure what to say, she felt like if she opened her mouth again she’d say something dumb again “what about 5th period?” she asked. “Skipping” Alix smiled at her, rolling out of the room on the skates she’d been told about a million times not to wear at school, when she made it to the door she turned to smile genuinely at Sabrina again “I like your look today” Alix winked, causing Sabrina to blush, with that, she left.

Sabrina was glad Alix had left when she did, it would have been embarrassing if she’d seen the dopey smile which Sabrina was unable to wash off of her face. She sighed relieved, she felt like it had been ages since she’d had a normal conversation with someone, where she wasn’t desperate to please the other person, just talking as two people. She’d gotten so used to trying to please everyone that it almost felt like it was the only way people could communicate.

Not that it hadn’t been an incredibly embarrassing conversation. Thinking back on it, Sabrina still didn’t know how long Alix had heard her talking to herself! And that wink… she couldn’t have been flirting with her could she? What if Sabrina had given her some wrong impression, or accidentally sent some signal? Sabrina went to google lesbian codes and secret flirts and such, but she realized her phone was still missing, her hand felt so empty without it… She doubted that talking to herself in the bathroom was secret slang though, she was just overthinking things. As long as she didn’t wear violets anywhere she’d be alright.

Sabrina still wasn’t sure what to say to Marinette, but it was true what Alix said, if she just tried being nice and tried being honest, then Marinette would see her effort and like her! Of course… Marinette could also laugh in her face and stomp on her feelings… being honest and vulnerable was never without risk. But she needed to face that risk, and it was easier now that, if all else failed, she could at least try hanging out with Alix, even if it might be a little awkward.

Sabrina found Marinette and Alya sitting in the courtyard by one of the tables near the wall. From their expressions they were talking about something exciting, seemingly plotting something fun. Sabrina wasn’t sure if she could force herself into a conversation like that, should she wait? No… there was never going to be a perfect time, and she had to make the most out of the time Chloé wasn’t back yet. Biting her lip, Sabrina approached the two girls, trying her best to put on the most casual face she could muster.

“hi Marinette!” Sabrina felt the words come out more forcefully than she’d wanted, she’d almost yelled, she squinted, recomposing herself “oh? Uh… hi Sabrina” in spite of an awkward start, Marinette and Alya both gave her friendly, quizzical looks. “uh well…! I was just wondering…” _I should have practiced more… oh god… what do I say!?_ Sabrina’s train of thought was interrupted by what sounded like a faraway explosion. “what was that?” Sabrina looked over her shoulder towards the noise, “looks like a monster is attacking downtown.” Alya’s speed with her phone was impressive; she showed Sabrina and Marinette a live feed of a terrifying 8 foot tall clown, capturing people in balloons.

Sabrina watched the scene play out for a few seconds, then remembering what she was doing, “anyway, I was wondering if…” Marinette got up from her seat and gave her and Alya an apologetic look “sorry! I just remembered I have to go to the bathroom” Sabrina and Alya both raised an eyebrow at Marinette “oh uh… I mean I have to go to the bathroom and then go help at the shop at home!” before Sabrina could say anything, the pigtailed girl had already disappeared in a dash.

Sabrina had allowed her chance to slip past her, what rotten luck! Or had Marinette been that desperate to not talk to her? It was a scary thought, but not at all unreasonable, last time she’d tried befriending Marinette, Sabrina had called her 23 times, written 13 messages and left 8 voicemails in the span of 3 hours. If someone acted that desperately with her, she might run away too. Sabrina brushed the hair out of her face, _way to go Sabrina, way to blow it!_

“so… what’s up?” Sabrina was startled awake by Alya’s voice. She’d been so focused on talking to Marinette that she’d forgotten Alya was there. The blogger gave Sabrina a sweet smile, Alya always felt really friendly, but because Chloé was so focused on fighting Marinette, Sabrina had never really thought of Alya as anything other than Marinette’s sidekick. The Sabrina to Marinette’s Chloé… it was a depressing thought that she’d overlooked someone because they were in the same social situation as her. But maybe Alya was the perfect person to talk to, as long as Sabrina didn’t call her 23 times within the three hours after talking she’d already be in a better position than with Marinette.

“well it’s just…” Sabrina was lost for words again, why hadn’t she practiced properly damn it! “not sure what to do with yourself with Chloé in America?” Alya smiled at her sympathetically, giving Sabrina the courage to sit down in front of her. “kind of…” Sabrina admitted, but there was more to it than that, so much more. “why _did_ Chloé leave so suddenly? You don’t just fly off to another continent without preparation, it seems like the teachers didn’t know about it at all” Alya mused, clearly not trying to tug at the heartstrings that she was managing to pull.

Sabrina sighed deeply “I don’t know. I don’t know when she decided to go… She didn’t tell me she was going to leave at all!” Sabrina could feel some of yesterdays frustration welling up in her again, she had to be careful, she didn’t want to cause a scene, especially in front of the girl whose diary was open to the public on her blog. “wait really?” Alya gave her a concerned look “are you alright?” Sabrina felt stunned, Alya actually seemed like she cared about her feelings in this, and she understood how it might have upset her. Sabrina felt like she was going to cry, but managed to bring it back. “I’m not sure… I was really upset yesterday.” Sabrina scratched the surface of the table with her nail, she was worried about oversharing, that Alya was going to use this against her in the future but… looking into her eyes, Sabrina wanted to trust her. She also realized that the words almost seemed to fly out of her on their own, she needed to talk about it to someone.

Sabrina breathed deeply and stood up to walk around the table to sit next to Alya, “can you find Chloé’s feed from yesterday?” she asked, then began telling Alya about everything that happened yesterday, about how Chloé hadn’t told her anything, about Nathalie the ‘NEWBFF’ and about smashing her phone… Sabrina left out the parts about her parents of course, she wasn’t looking to start crying in front of everyone.

“so yea… I think that pretty much sums it up…” Sabrina was looking at the table while talking, she felt like she had said too much, but once she’d started it had been like a floodgate opening. She really had needed to get it off her chest, even if it might have ended up being just another way for her to call a potential new friend 23 times… Sabrina suddenly felt Alya’s arms wrapping around her in a tight, warm hug. Sabrina wanted to pull away at first, but with every passing second it felt more and more comfortable, just having someone acknowledge her feelings and comforting her. Sabrina allowed herself to sink in against Alya’s kind body, trying not to care if anyone saw, though in the back of her mind she hoped Alix wouldn’t see and get a wrong idea somehow.

When Alya let go of her, Sabrina felt like she would have liked the hug to go on longer. Alya drummed her fingers against the table “that’s really messed up…” she said, scanning over Sabrina’s face to see how she was doing. Sabrina nodded sadly “I know… she keeps doing stuff like this and I just keep coming back to her. I don’t think I want to be her friend anymore but… I also don’t know how to make other friends…” Sabrina sighed softly, she should have talked to someone else sooner.

“well hey… I’m not sure it’s the best way to go about it but…” Alya placed a knuckle against Sabrina’s arm softly, making her look up at Alya, she was shooting her a sweet smile “you definitely made a friend today, so good job!” Alya smiled broadly, holding up a peace sign. Sabrina smiled back, unsure what to do she leaned forward to hug Alya again, trying to keep herself from crying. She really _really_ should have told someone sooner…


	4. Chapter 4

After a brief hug, the two girls found themselves sitting in silence, clearly both unsure what to talk about, the awkwardness was growing rapidly. The silence was broken by Alya’s phone notifying her, _thank god_ Sabrina thought, breathing heavily now that they weren’t awkwardly looking at one another. Sabrina looked at Alya’s display, which showed Ladybug and Chat Noir on the scene, fighting the clown, whose limbs seemed to have inflated, making him tower above the buildings. Alya had a mysterious expression while looking at the display, remembering Alya’s ladyblog a thought suddenly struck Sabrina “oh gosh, am I keeping you from going?” she asked, worried. Alya chuckled “it’s still school hours, it’s not like I can just run off whenever something like this happens” Sabrina gave her a skeptical look “I seem to recall that being exactly what you did last time” Sabrina scanned Alya’s face, she seemed a little flustered, “uh… that was sort of special” she said, running her fingers through her hair “you also left the time before that” Sabrina insisted, amused and intrigued by Alya’s sudden defensiveness.

“alright alright… but don’t tell anyone.” Sabrina’s eyes lit up “of course” she said, her curiosity shining through her eyes. “I’m really terrified of clowns…” Alya admitted with a halfsmile, making Sabrina giggle. “I don’t know… there’s just something about them… I’ve always felt they were creepy, and I just made the mistake of watching that new horror movie with my older cousins. I couldn’t tell them I was too scared! I still have nightmares…” Alya laughed with Sabrina, “I know what you mean, my dad _loves_ really scary movies, he allowed me to watch with him a few times, I don’t know why I keep saying I want to, I don’t think I’m ever going to get the image of someone sawing off their own leg out of my head… my dad thinks I _like_ those movies now!” Alya placed a hand on Sabrina’s shoulder empathically, a smile appeared on her lips, born more from solidarity than joy “my cousins too, they said, and I quote” Alya lifted her finger in a cartooney way, doing an elaborate parody of her cousin “aw man! If you like that then I know just what we should watch next time! This is just surface level shit!” Alya slumped over the table upon finishing her scene, “I’m doomed…” she said, neck on the table, causing Sabrina to laugh “it’s a conspiracy!” she said. “Exactly! I don’t think _anyone_ likes horror! They just get caught in the same web we have!” the two laughed together.

Sabrina felt so relieved to be able to talk to someone who felt like she was on her level, instead of always having to think of Chloé’s needs and wants first. This must be what they meant when they said ‘clicking’ with someone, after the initial awkwardness it felt so natural to just talk. Alya’s phone plinged repeatedly, but the brown haired girl ignored it, paying attention to Sabrina instead. Sabrina had thought Alya was completely unable to put her phone down, but even with it blowing up right next to her, it seemed to bother Sabrina more than it bothered Alya herself. Sabrina couldn’t help but look down at the phone, what in the world was going on? “ah don’t mind that” Alya assured her, “it’s because Ladybug is fighting, so a few people who follow me want to know my reaction and opinion, but it’s not a big deal, I’ll write an extensive analysis when I get home” she was trying to play it off as unimportant, but the way her face lit up when talking about it made it obvious that she was very proud of how people looked to her.

“so uh… who do you think she is? Ladybug I mean” Sabrina asked her, imagining that Alya would likely enjoy talking about it, from the excitement spreading on her face, she’d been correct. “well! I know she’s close. She usually hangs around this part of town during the day, and around near the Arc De Triomphe near the evening and night!” She said excitedly, “how do you know that?” Sabrina asked, tilting her head to the side. “Well!” Alya opened a series of maps on her phone, with red lines and circles which she seemed to have drawn herself all over the place. “Ladybug has an average traveling speed of about 60 kilometers per hour” she began, “wow that’s… that’s really fast” Sabrina said, just trying to imagine going that fast without a helmet or anything. Alya nodded enthusiastically “it super is! Anyway, because she travels over buildings, she almost always goes in a straight line, meaning that if you look at each and every time she’s come to someone’s rescue, you begin getting a really narrow map of possible places she could have come from. And the data doesn’t lie, I think she might be someone in this school. She could even be you…” Alya looked over Sabrina with a skeptical, piercing gaze “trying to get close to me eh? Know what I know? Are you going to capture me for knowing too much!?” Alya waxed poetically at Sabrina, dramatically throwing her head back and placing the back of her hand to her forehead. Sabrina chuckled at the silly notion “you’ve seen me together with Ladybug, like many times!” she said, “a likely story! Who is to say that wasn’t a stunt double!?” Alya took a Ladybug mask from her bag up and held it up to Sabrina’s face, stroking her chin while giving her best parody of Sherlock Holmes. This caused Sabrina to break out in a small fit of laughter, it was soon joined by Alya’s own chuckles.

“But you really think Ladybug is a girl from our school?” Sabrina looked around, thinking over her classmates, there wasn’t exactly a clear candidate. “or boy” Alya stated confidently, “I’m not leaving out any possibility!” she looked into the courtyard where Ivan, the huge but gentle classmate of theirs was walking past, following her eyes Sabrina couldn’t help but chuckle “those tights might be tighter than we all thought is what you’re saying”, the two smiled, imagining Ivan having to squeeze into the teeny tiny spandex suit.

“What I don’t get is, why haven’t you just looked at someone with Ladybug’s features in our school?” Sabrina wondered aloud, “ohoh! Why didn’t I think of that!” Alya said dramatically, faking an epiphany, she gave Sabrina a knowing look “describe Ladybug for me” she said, clearly knowing something Sabrina didn’t. “uh well… she’s got long red hair, she’s very pale and has a sharp nose and slightly pouty lips?” Alya chuckled as though something was funny about her description, pouty lips maybe? Still, it wasn’t a _bad_ description “well _you_ describe her then!” she said defensively. Alya smiled at her “Ladybug has tan, sunkissed skin, light brown hair and a soft button nose” the description made Sabrina do a double take “uh… no she isn’t!” she blurted out defensively, if this was her idea of a joke it wasn’t very funny.

“Calm down, calm down” Alya assured her, opening her phone and finding a survey “it took me awhile to figure out, but it turns out, no one can agree what Ladybug and Chat Noir look like. Most people see both of them as pretty similar looking to themselves.” Alya showed the survey results, showing that amongst thousands of people, Ladybugs hair colour was split between blonde, dark and light brown primarily, then ten other colour’s with fewer votes. She looked at Alya perplexed “you’re kidding me…?” Alya shook her head “nope, it’s hard to believe I know, but Paris’ heroes have some kind of illusion, keeping us from seeing what they really look like. Isn’t that amazing!?”  

Alya looked up at the sky “I’ll admit I was a little disappointed when I first found out, I thought it was kind of amazing that Paris’ number 1 hero happened to be like me you know? But she’s probably white, and that’s ok of course… It’s hard to put into words without sounding a little, you know… but it’s a little disappointing still.” Sabrina was still trying to cope with what Alya was saying, could she really look like anyone and they wouldn’t be the wiser? Looking back over at Ivan, the image of him stepping into the tight jumpsuit was suddenly a little less funny, there was no way, right…!?  Alya looked at her face and smiled “yea, welcome to my world.” She waved her hands as though casting a spell “welcome to the Bugzone…! Where up is down and even our teachers could be Ladybug and Chat Noir!” Alya bellowed like a Disney villain.

Sabrina was about to ask something else, when a red alarm signal began blaring on Alya’s phone. Before Sabrina could ask, Alya had snatched the phone up and was frantically unlocking it “that’s the Ladylarm! It means something really big happened in this fight! Oh god… I should have gone!” she looked like she was possessed, flipping through messages and news “Ladybug got hurt!” she said, touching her lip in a slight panic. Sabrina scooted over to sit shoulder to shoulder with Alya, looking at what looked to be hundreds of messages all talking about Ladybug being hurt in today’s fight. Alya quickly found a video, the two watched breathlessly as Ladybug was flung through the air by the huge monster, half balloon half clown, she’d been knocked through a window and it looked like her arm had been cut up pretty badly. The fight had continued, with Ladybug valiantly pushing through an obvious injury, saving the day in spite of it. When they saw Ladybug finally capturing the black butterfly, the two girls both sighed in relief, having both held their breath a little too long. You could see in the video how everything, including the small amount of blood on the window was cleaned up by Ladybugs powers, the slashes in her outfit got repaired as well, but even though she tried to hide it, it was pretty obvious that she was still injured when she swung off.

Alya sat stunned looking at the video “do you know what this means?” she asked, “that Ladybug is alright” Sabrina responded, still a little rattled by the first message simply being “ _Ladybug got hurt_ ” that had really thrown her for a loop. “well yes, thank goodness. But also! It means whoever Ladybug is, will have an injury on their left arm and wrist tomorrow!” Alya beamed at Sabrina, who was starting to understand “and so if she goes to our school…” Sabrina said, Alya finishing the sentence “then we might be able to finally unmask her tomorrow!” Alya seemed completely ecstatic. Sabrina hadn’t ever cared much about who Ladybug really was, but seeing Alya’s excitement, and having learned so much just from talking to her, the idea of helping Alya unmask Ladybug suddenly sounded a hundred times more interesting than helping Chloé cheat Adrien into giving her another autographed poster, this might actually be really cool!

 

 


	5. the true identity of Ladybug revealed!?

Sabrina had a spring in her step while walking to school the next day, she’d barely gotten any sleep, she’d spend hours reading through the Ladyblog. She’d known that Alya was obsessed with Ladybug and that her blog was kind of popular, but it was huge compared to what she’d thought. Sure there were _only_ a few tens of thousands on it regularly, but so many of them were incredibly active, working together to come up with theories and testing them with science well beyond what a high schooler was capable of.

There was so much to read and even more to think about, and Sabrina had only scratched the surface of it. As she was walking to class she realized she’d completely forgot to do her homework, she was usually very diligent, especially as someone who had to do every assignment twice, once for herself and once for Chloé. Somehow having missed it didn’t feel like a huge loss, she’d have been freaking out about it last week, but today it felt like she was ready to face the consequences of her actions. Maybe the new Sabrina she was finding this week was a rebel! She chuckled to herself as she walked into class 45 minutes early to prepare for the day and review what little homework she _did_ have, since it had been finished early, _yeap… such a rebel_ she smirked.

Sitting at her bench she worked on some last minute math, confident she could pull off at least a passing grade in the time allotted, doing it this way almost made it seem like a test, which was a good way to put her in the mindspace of quickly and effectively working. She was used to sitting alone for the first 15 to 20 minutes until the first other students began arriving. Nathaniel and Rose both came from out of town and thus were usually first to arrive, because of public transport. Then it was pretty up in the air who would arrive when, usually Alya, Chloé and Adrien arrived a bit earlier than the rest, with Marinette almost always arriving at the last possible minute, or 5 to 10 minutes late.

The math in front of her didn’t require much thought, the first few had needed some concentration, but then there were 3 pages of similar problems just to show that they had understood it properly. This allowed Sabrina’s mind to wander through the classroom, could Ladybug really be one of her classmates? It seemed impossible to think that anyone in their class was smart, sophisticated and talented enough to be a superhero.

Thinking about her classmates performance in gym class, it was hard to imagine anyone being able to perform the stunts that Ladybug was capable of. Except Alix… Alix seemed to be kind, smart and badass, she wasn’t as sophisticated as Sabrina thought Ladybug should be but… could it be Chloé’s interpretation of Ladybug creating a false image of what she was actually like? Thinking about the times Sabrina had actually _met_ Ladybug, she hadn’t seemed overly sophisticated or suave, just down to earth, kind and a little coy, a lot like Alix…

Sabrina bit softly down on her pencil, taking care not to leave icky teeth marks on it, she flipped over a work sheeth and wrote Alix down next to the number 1. She rubbed her nose, then placed a collective ‘the boys’ near the bottom, Alya was technically correct that Ladybug _could_ maybe be one of the boys but… it seemed unlikely at best. She placed the teachers under the boys, she didn’t want to live in a world where ms. Mendeleiev dressed as a teenager and fought monsters. Thinking on it, she wrote ms. Bustier over the boys, she was a pretty cool teacher, she seemed more likely than Ivan, and maybe Sabrina could still sleep at night if she was jumping around Paris in spandex, at least more so than if it was the principal.

Rose, Mylène and Juleka got to live just above ms. Bustier, they just didn’t seem Ladybug material, shy, hesitant and clumsy. Speaking of clumsy… Marinette got the spot just over them, she was able to show a lot of strength once in awhile, standing up to Chloé and others, she had character, but she was also shy and a little timid at times. More than anything, Sabrina had a hard time seeing the girl who tripped over her own feet on numerous occasions, as Paris’ number one hero. So that left… Chloé… Sabrina could never in a million years imagine Chloé as Ladybug, especially with the way she worshipped the superhero, it just didn’t make any sense right? Chloé got to live where she belonged, bottom of the list. It felt good to write her down there, Sabrina’s secret little revenge, so she underlined it, just because.

Sabrina looked over her list, of course there were a bunch of other classes in the school, but she didn’t know the students in those that well, if it turned out Alix wasn’t Ladybug, she’d suggest Alya that they move onto another classroom, everyone else was simply too unlikely. Looking at the list, she couldn’t help but think she forgot someone, but who could it be? _oh!_ Sabrina remembered the last classmate whom she’d overlooked because she literally couldn’t be Ladybug. She was about to place it at the very bottom of the list but hesitated. It seemed crazy but… weren’t there superheroes who had obscured their real identity by publically speaking out against their alter ego? Or earning money by taking pictures of themselves and pretending to just be… an avid fan or confidant…

The thought that had seemed so silly at first began slowly digging its way into Sabrina’s skull. The more she thought about it, the more it seemed to make sense. On the forums, it was a popular theory that Ladybug could somehow be in two places at once, that when she becomes Ladybug, her civilian self keeps walking around, covering her secret identity. They analysis of yesterdays fight said that Ladybug had seemed distracted through the fight, like something was wrong even before it started. Could it be because her ‘other mind’ was busy talking to her? No, the analysts had said she looked concerned or even scared, almost as if… she was scared of clowns.

“Hey!” a friendly greeting made Sabrina jump in her seat, Alya was approaching her with a big smile painted on her face. Sabrina flipped the worksheet over frantically; everything she knew about Alya had suddenly been put into a new light, like a curtain had been pulled back and suddenly the world made sense. Sabrina’s eyes drifted nervously down to Alya’s arm, her usual bare arms, covered in a long sleeved flannel shirt, Sabrina’s heart skipped a beat.

“what’s the matter?” Alya leaned forward, coming face to face with Sabrina, beaming with the kind of enthusiasm most teenagers reserved for _after_ school, “you look like you’ve seen a ghost”. Alya scanned Sabrina’s face curiously, concerned, “I heard there was some kind of stomach bug going around, are you alright?” Sabrina swallowed hard “yes of course! I’m alright haha…hah… I’m just not a morning person is all… didn’t sleep well” Sabrina gave her a forced smile, but she knew she sounded too defensive.

Sabrina’s world suddenly froze as another realization dawned on her, something Alya had said yesterday. _“are you going to capture me for knowing too much?”_ Alya had said that… She’d said that if Sabrina had been Ladybug, and Alya had known, then Ladybug… would have had to _gulp_ silence Alya. So… If Alya really _was_ Ladybug, could it be she hadn’t been joking at all? Could it have been a subtle warning about digging too deeply into the true nature of who the heroine was behind the mask…? Sabrina felt her throat closing up, she knew it was plastered all over her face, she could feel beads of sweat starting to form on her forehead, hoping desperately that Alya wouldn’t notice.

“what’s this?” Alya grapped the worksheet and turned it to see Sabrina’s scribbles, reading it over. Sabrina was about to desperately grab it so Alya wouldn’t find out what she knew, but realized that she hadn’t gotten to put Alya on the list, in fact it might be a great way to throw the resourceful girl off of her scent! “it’s… kind of dumb but…” Sabrina said nervously, embarrassed by the childish speculations on the list, it seemed stupid now, now that she knew…

Alya’s face lit up even more while reading the list “this is great! I’m not sure I’m 100% in agreement, but it’s _so_ cool to see you taking an interest in this too!” She smiled like a golden morning sun at Sabrina “after we parted yesterday I was so worried that I’d forced this on you, I didn’t think you cared much about it, but I mean, look at this! Clearly my obsession’s rubbed off on you!” she shone, it occurred to Sabrina that Alya might not have anyone to talk to about these things, Marinette seemed dodgy whenever Sabrina had heard Alya talking about Ladybug, she didn’t seem to care a lot about it. Sabrina also realized that while Ladybug looking for herself in order to keep her secret identity made sense in theory, in practice Alya was looking way too hard for herself, could it be she had an ulterior motive?  

Sabrina had to keep herself from letting out a small gasp. What if Alya was looking for someone to be her confidant, to help keep her secret identity? Someone who was smart enough to figure it out based on the clues she herself planted. It was a test! It was all a big test! Sabrina bit her lip, she wasn’t sure what exactly would be the reward of passing, but she knew that she was quite good at tests, and that she hadn’t ever wanted to pass one as much as she did this one!

 


	6. Chapter 6

Alya sat down next to Sabrina, bringing out a set of worksheets from her bag and placing them next to Sabrina, giving her a knowing smile. Sabrina looked at the finished worksheets, could she really just copy Alya’s homework? It occurred to Sabrina that she’d done Cloé’s homework every day for almost two years, but she’d never actually had someone else help her with her’s, it was weird, she felt like she didn’t deserve it. Looking up at Alya, Sabrina realized that Alya’s expression was genuine, it wasn’t looking for something from her, she was just doing something nice for her because… because that’s what friends are supposed to do…

Sabrina could feel her body tensing, losing the sensation in her fingers. She wasn’t sure why but she felt upset, like her body was rejecting something about the situation. Until she could figure out what was pressing down on her she decided to bury her own worksheets back in her bag, giving Alya a small smile, ignoring the slight grip at her heart “I’d rather talk to you until class starts” she said, the best lie was a true one, and this was as on point as it could get.

Alya smiled back at her, looking to the classroom door “let’s observe people as they enter, see if we can discredit anyone from the get go” she suggested, the two of them primed and ready to observe people’s sleeve lengths. Of course, Sabrina couldn’t quite concentrate on anyone’s arms except for Alya’s, how could she approach asking about it?

Adrien and Nino were the first to enter the classroom, both wearing windbreakers. Alya and Sabrina looked at each other expectantly, but the two boys soon stripped down to their usual shirts, their arms clearly visible, without anything to see. Alya gave her an encouraging smile, they still had quite a few classmates left to check. Nino and Adrien both approached them curiously, making Sabrina tense up. She couldn’t remember Adrien ever actually approaching her. Having someone she’d been chasing, even if it was for someone else, suddenly coming to her with a friendly smile, it was a weird feeling.

Sabrina wasn’t sure how to react to Adrien, her usual overly friendly smile? No probably not… she’d caught a glimpse of her reflection one day while showing that smile and… it felt so rehearsed and maybe it would only be evident to herself, but the expression was undeniably sad. Looking up into the blonde beauty’s eyes she felt her face stiffen into the mask she’d just decided not to wear, like an instinctual response. She cursed herself as she could see Adrien take notice and smile awkwardly back.

“conspiring against us?” Nino said with a boyish grin, sitting on the table in front of Alya “is Adrien going to have to watch out for the combined powers of his fangirls?” Alya grinned back “oh if his fans united there’s be nothing that could stop them, unfortunately we’re more concerned with everyone’s favorite lady in red right now” Alya leaned forward to gently touch Nino’s arm, she was too focused to notice the usually cocky boy blush as she did “speaking of which…” she inspected his arm, probably for make up or something similar before letting him go with a sigh “you’re off the hook this time, but I’m watching you… Ladybug” she said sternly, looking up at the poor confused and blushing boy.

Adrien laughed and gently slammed a palm against Nino’s back, making him snap out of it. “man, if Nino was Ladybug I think I’d have to give up my dreams of being the next Sherlock” he grinned, looking over his friend, who could only smile awkwardly as Alya and Adriend exchanged grinning gazes. “what…?” Nino said, shrinking nervously like a gazelle before two lionesses.

“We’re not convinced.” Adrien said with a smirk “maybe we need some proof that you haven’t been keeping this from us all this time” Alya nodded “yea, why don’t you read some lines so we can compare it to the real Ladybug” she grinned. Sabrina was a little surprised by how the three of them acted, looking at how the two of them teamed up on him it wasn’t exactly the same but… she couldn’t help but think of the ridiculous things Chloé occasionally made her do, was Nino in that same situation?

To Sabrina’s surprise Nino’s expression softened into a genuine laugh, he got up from the table and dramatically posed like he was going to throw Ladybug’s yoyo. He grinned as he got into position “time to deevilize!” he dramatically called out, raising a finger to the sky, then forcefully throwing his hand forward, a piece of paper he’d hidden in his palm flying forward to strike Alya on the forehead. She yelped, more in surprise than pain, almost falling off her chair.

Alya stood, a sadistic smile plastered on her face, flipping the piece of paper in her hand. “Not so fast Ladybug, seems Lady Wifi is going to have to teach you a lesson!” she threw the crumbled up piece of paper at Nino, who managed to dodge out of the way at the last second “haha! You’ll have to do better than that if you want to…” Nino looked thoughtful for a second, trying to remember, Alya scoffed “unveil Ladybug’s secret identity!” she laughed evilly.

Nino grinned “you know I should have been able to guess that one, are you sure you were actually akumatized at all?” Alya laughed “you’ve learned my secret! I just made it up to try and unmask her!” she found her collection of small cute erasers in her pencil case “but you won’t live to tell the tale!” she began pelting Nino with erasers, hitting him twice before he took cover behind the teachers desk. “help me Chat Noir! You’re my only hope!” he yelled dramatically from behind the desk, the reference made Sabrina laugh. Alya turned to Adrien and Sabrina, scanning them over.

Sabrina looked at Adrien, waiting for him to jump in to save his friend, but to her surprise he was pointing at her with a dopey smile. Sabrina looked stunned at Adrien for a moment before looking back towards Alya, who grabbed another eraser with an evil chuckle, looking into her eyes. Sabrina felt a yelp escape as she dodged out of the way of the piece of rubber, mercifully thrown very softly.

Looking around her she jumped up to roll onto the second tier desks, rolling into cover above Alya, behind the tables. “you’ll never defeat me that way!” Alya boasted, using the small interlude to pick up a few of the scattered erasers. “you’re mistaken…” Sabrina said hesitantly, trying to not sound stupid, she picked through her thoughts desperate for something to follow that up with “it’s over Lady Wifi! I have the high ground!” She said, peeking out from above, striking a bold pose and pointing at Alya, immediately regretting everything, from the pose to the cheesy reference to the worst Star Wars movie.

Alya had paused, looking up into Sabrina’s eyes with an unreadable expression. _Well… she’d ruined the game… again…_ Sabrina wanted to bury her face in her hands, but to her surprise Alya burst out laughing like it was actually funny. Adrien grinned up at her approvingly; he almost looked like he was proud of her. Sabrina stood stunned, that feeling from before, that feeling that something she couldn’t place was wrong with this situation, that she didn’t belong in this warmth in front of her.

She was knocked out of her thoughts when Nino appeared from behind Alya, putting his arms around Alya’s from behind, locking them in place like some kind of wrestler. “now Chat Noir!” Sabrina hesitated for a moment before hastily making her way down towards Alya and Nino, she was about to reach Alya when she felt a sudden bump on the side of her head, an eraser fell to the floor next to her. She looked up confused to see Adrien, holding two more erasers, standing coyly against the bench, “what’s a good villain without a good henchman?” he asked, lopping another eraser towards Sabrina, who took quick cover, as if the gently traveling piece of rubber was going to seriously harm her.

“hah! Excellent work! … um… Phone… no, Modem! Yes! Sidekick Modem! Get Chat Noir! I’ll take care of Ladybug!” the teenagers giggled, threw erasers and paper at one another, dashing and dodging around in the large classroom. At one point Sabrina got to hit Adrien on the arm with a ruler, she couldn’t help but think what Chloé would give to do something similar, the thought made her giggle.

The bell rang, saving Sabrina from Alya’s tickle attack. The four of them looked around the classroom, it was a complete mess, but more importantly it was completely empty except for them. “where _is_ everyone?” Alya said, getting up and brushing herself off, correcting her glasses. “I heard something on the news about an insane number of people being sick because of some bacteria in the water?” Nino said, making the three others exchange glances.

The four of them cleaned their mess quickly, Alya checking her phone in the meantime “it’s insane… they say it’s nothing serious, that it should pass in a day or two, but apparently everyone who drank the spoiled water are sick, almost all of Paris is standing still, most of the busses aren’t even running.” The four looked at each other, trying to wrap their heads around what that even meant for them.

Nino was the first whose stunned face turned into a smile “so what I’m hearing you say is that we have the day off to spend with friends?” he wrapped an arm around Adrien and Alya’s shoulders, the two of them quickly growing to smile with him. Sabrina rubbed her arm, happy that she got to spend some time with them like this, it had been a lot of fun. If she was off school then she’d be able to catch up on some work, maybe watch some daytime television.

Sabrina was half turned towards her desk, about to grab her back when she felt hands on each of her shoulders, pulling her into the huddle with the others. “so we’ll have a day of adventures around ghosttown Paris?” Adrien said smirking, holding Sabrina close to him and Alya. Sabrina looked at the other’s faces confused “but… with me too?” she asked, causing Alya to scoff. Sabrina felt the beautiful brown skinned girl place her head against Sabrina’s “of course with you dummy! lets go sidekicks!” Alya said, enthusiastically leading the huddled group towards the exit, walking huddled was awkward and difficult, but pretty fun. "wait! my bag!" Sabrina suddenly remembered, "mine too!" said Nino. "Where we're going we won't need bags!" Alya said, laughing with the others.

 


	7. Chapter 7

Sabrina bit her lip, staring into the mirror, trying to get used to the girl in front of her. She’d been swept up in the excitement yesterday, going shopping with Alya, Nino and Adrien. They’d actually included her in their talks, asked her opinion, not the way Chloé did, where if she asked it was just so she could have a second person agreeing with her, but like… actually asked what she felt or thought.

She hadn’t thought that she’d have money for a new outfit, but Alya had laughed when she said she only had 20 Euro. She’d nearly forgotten how long money could stretch if you didn’t buy designer clothes. She smiled, remembering her aversion to walking into a thrift store, what would Chloé have thought of the store? _She’d probably have melted when she entered,_ Sabrina chuckled to herself.

The four of them had tried on clothes for hours, most of the stuff they’d found was incredibly unfashionable, and a few gems looked like they couldn’t possibly have _ever_ been in style. She’d burst out laughing at a multicolored, three-piece suit, in colors no person should ever wear. She’d have to eat her words again when Adrien modeled it though. Somehow when he threw the shiny multicolored mess onto his shoulders, it seemed to transform from gaudy into strangely fashionable. She had concluded that the boy was a witch, able to transform even the ugliest thing into something beautiful, maybe that was why Chloé wanted him so desperately.

As Sabrina put on the simple black top with the diamond print she’d bought, she remembered Alya’s encouragement that it suited her, she felt flustered anew, just remembering the three friendly faces telling her she looked good. She wondered if Chloé felt that way when Sabrina told her how good she looked, if that was the reason she kept her around in the first place. If that was indeed the reason then Sabrina felt she could hardly blame Chloé, she would bask in those happy faces and compliments forever if she could.

Sabrina felt the knot in her stomach which was slowly becoming familiar to her, it was as though the nicer everyone around her was to her, the more something inside her pushed back. It started by making it hard to breathe and slowly began in her stomach, like a hand was grabbing at her guts and slowly pulling downwards. She’d thought maybe it was because she felt like she was betraying Chloé, but she was growing increasingly certain that this wasn’t it. It worried her, not knowing what it was that was causing this strange reaction from her.

Sabrina let out a long cleansing sigh; she was slowly starting to look like someone who belonged with the rest of her amazing and beautiful classmates. It wasn’t just the clothes; she was starting to see something behind her eyes, a light that she hadn’t seen before. She’d always hated looking in the mirror but… today instead of seeing all of the things Chloé had pointed out, or that Sabrina knew she probably _would_ point out, Sabrina was instead seeing someone she wasn’t familiar with. Not someone confident, God knows she’d probably never get that far, but maybe someone just capable of being a person, instead of a shadow.

Sabrina got into her high black knee socks and put on her new turquoise skirt, she had to laugh, this time at least she was aware that even though the change seemed big to her, it was barely noticeable. Still, the small section of exposed leg between her skirt and sock made her feel less constricted, even if she wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to not wearing leggings or pants.

She put on her glasses on the way out the door, feeling the world blur around her _right… I’m wearing contacts_ she chuckled to herself as she placed the glasses in her bag instead, running her hands against the side of her face where her glasses would normally be, trying to get her body and mind used to the idea that she wasn’t watching the world through a screen anymore, she was participating in it.

The streets on the way to school were once again bustling with the life of morning, busy people living their busy lives. She sighed a sigh of relief, no matter what had made everyone sick yesterday, it must have been a 24 hour thing. Alya would surely want to go hunting for Ladybug’s scratched arm today if the other students had shown up, which sounded exciting, even if it might be awkward, groping at ladies arms all day. She wondered how much Alya wanted her to participate, what might people think of her, running around with Alya staring at random girls…

Sabrina snapped awake as a hand gently touched her shoulder, she instinctively jolted away, looking shocked up at Alix. The rollerblading girl looked at her with a raised eyebrow, judging Sabrina’s extreme reaction. The redhaired girl felt her face brighten; of all the girls to catch her with thoughts like that it had to be Alix. Sabrina still wasn’t sure if maybe Alix could have misunderstood something about their last conversation, if she could have somehow thought Sabrina was hitting on her, which was silly of course…

“thought that was you” Alix said with a friendly tone “there’s only like three people in Paris who wear that shade of blue” she smiled teasingly, further flustering Sabrina. “um…” Sabrina struggled for words, Alix had a way of catching her when she felt vulnerable and just making it worse from there… “were you sick yesterday too?” Alix asked, to which Sabrina shook her head softly “no but… you didn’t miss anything… most of the teachers were sick too so we were sent home” Sabina swallowed, she felt like every word out of her mouth was another nail in the coffin that’d make Alix realize that she was a… dork.

“That’s good, lucky you huh? Got a day off and managed to avoid the plague” Alix began slowly skating towards school, at a pace where Sabrina could keep up easily. Come to think of it, Sabrina was often passed on her way to school by the purple haired rollerblader, she’d never acknowledged Sabrina on her way though. Was Sabrina actually beginning to turn corporeal? She was so used to being a shadow… it was kind of terrifying, the thought that people other than Chloé might be able to notice her at all.

“so uh…” Sabrina struggled desperately to find a conversation topic, why had she started it with _so uh_ if she’d just said nothing she could have waited until she’d thought of something, now every second made it more awkward! “Was it bad? I just hear people were sick, I’m not sure what actually happened”

Sabrina found her breath again as Alix began scratching her chin “it was pretty bad yea… family would have fought one another to death over the toilet if we’d had the energy to do so. So yea, pretty much the entire day was spend trying to hold in my bowels while waiting my turn” Alix smiled as though it was a normal thing to say, chuckling when she saw Sabrina’s face of disbelief and disgust. Sabrina couldn’t believe anyone could say something like that with a straight face, much less laughing about it afterwards.

“at first they thought it was another akuma, y’kno that was making everyone sick? But it turns out a huge amount of camembert cheese in the water supply. Noone knows who or why, but it sure made everyone sick quick. Thankfully only for a day or two, the mayor made it so they gave out stomach medicine yesterday in the evening, you know, as soon as he could get off of the shitter himself” Alix laughed, Sabrina could only smile awkwardly at her, she wasn’t used to people talking like that at all, she wasn’t sure what to think, it made her feel awkward.

“what about you? Didn’t drink water Monday? Maybe you sustain yourself only on the radiation of turquoise?” Alix gave her that same teasing look, Sabrina bit her lip unnoticeably, she was starting to get the impression that… the art of not being a total pushover loser, didn’t mean not being picked on or trying not to be a beta, but in how she took stuff like this. It wasn’t like the comment hurt, she knew her color preference was strange, but it suited her and she really liked it. “you’re one to talk… is the limegreen a choise? Or is that just the healthy glow of where you were bitten by… a radioactive set of um… rollerblades?” _yea… way to go… that didn’t sound geeky or pathetic at all._ To her surprise, Alix laughed, punching Sabrina in the arm just a little harder than Sabrina would have preferred, “good one!” she chuckled, smiling broadly.

Sabrina began finding her quip as her and Alix made their way towards school. Alix seemed the kind to make harsh comments in a loving manner, her reaction telling Sabrina that she wanted to be told off, that she liked it when others gave as good as she did. It wasn’t easy, but it strangely build Sabrina’s confidence to get to use some of the comebacks she always bit off when talking to Chloé, though of course, she had to be careful not to say anything too mean.

A nagging feeling had started forming in the back of Sabrina’s mind, talking to Alix like they were friends, she didn’t have any right to just be friendly with her like that. Looking at Alix, seeing her friendly coy smile and genuine eyes, she was so… real. It wasn’t fair to her.

Sabrina swallowed hard, dreading the words she was trying to force herself to say, she owed that to her. “Alix I… have to tell you something…” Sabrina stopped and looked away, knowing she wouldn’t have the courage to say it, to probably ruin not only this friendship but the others she was slowly forming as well, but she felt like this secret would burn a hole through her stomach if she didn’t let it out.

“I was helping Chloé… dig up dirt on people… I know that’s wrong but…”  she was rambling, stay on task, just say it “and like… the truth is… I know that you’re…” she couldn’t say the dirty word, it just wouldn’t reach her mouth “I know that you like girls!” she finally managed to get out, feeling her face flush and her stomach pulling her downwards, threatening to bring her down under the crust of the earth. She felt dizzy.

 “alright, is that it?” Alix shrugged, turning towards the school “we’ll be late if we just stand here”. Sabrina was baffled, she wasn’t sure what to say, had she not been clear? Was Alix in denial? “I… I won’t tell anyone of course but… Chloé knows too… she might…” Sabrina tried, following after Alix, a hundred feelings fighting for dominance in her mind.

“so?” Alix said nonchalantly “it’s not a big secret. I just haven’t told a lot of people ‘cause it’s none of their business really. Not until I actually find a girlfriend anyway”. “but… but…” logic was failing Sabrina, did Alix not realize what she was saying? No one was that daft… “ok listen” Alix stopped and put a knuckle against Sabrina’s shoulder “I’m gay, it’s something I’ve known for awhile, and honestly it’s not a big deal. If you or Chloé have a problem with it, that’s your problem, not mine. I’m not ashamed of who I am ok?”

With that, Alix dashed forward, leaving Sabrina on the sidewalk like a discarded juice box, she felt stunned, “ _it’s not a big deal”_ … Sabrina wasn’t sure what to do with herself, she felt like her brain was working so hard that steam might escape from her ears. What if it wasn’t a big deal? What if all this time… she’d been denying it for no reason…

 

**Author's Note:**

> a little sadder than I was initially going for, but I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of this story.  
> This story will take Sabrina on a journey of standing up to Chloé and becomming more her own person.  
> I should have at least two or three more chapters up by the end of the week, so stay tuned if you want more!


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